Chapter 4: Clarence is still a fucking asshole
Far away from Beach City, at the Grand Canyon in Arizona…
“Oh fuck, we are in Colorado Arizona!” Connie said. “Why are we here? I thought we were going to space?”
“That is exactly what we are going to do, Connie! Just watch! WATCH!”
And then Amethyst grabbed Steven, Connie and Mayor Dewey and made them look inside the Grand Canyon, but they didn't see anything.
“I don't see anything at all” Steven said.
“Look again, then.” But before you look, I must do this!”
And then Amethyst licked her fingers and put them over the eyes of Steven, Connie and Mayor Dewey.
“Hey, what the fuck” Mayor Dewey said.
“Is this some kind of sick fetish, you sick fuck?” Connie asked, visibly enraged.
“Amethyst, why did you do that?” Steven asked. “Do you have healing saliva like me, or what?”
“No, my little pendejo” Amethyst replied. “But my saliva does have some magical powers that allow you to see spirits and invisible things and all that shit.”
“If you had that power why you never used it before?” Steven asked.
“I only got this power 2 years ago, and Pealr forbid me to use it on you, cos she thinks it is gross, but I think is not, cos saliva is natural shit and all that, sistah.”
“I agree with Pearl…” Mayor Dewey said. “Putting your saliva in the eyes of other people is not cool.”
“Um, yeah whatever.” Amethyst replied with disdain.
“Ok, now we have the magical saliva in our eyes, what are we supposed to see?” Connie asked. “OH SHIT, I see it now!”
What Connie saw some kind of starship alien spaceship, which look like a jellyfish and was decorated with several sparkly stars, most of them rose-colored, because it was Rose Quartz who built that spaceship.
“Shit! Was this thing here the whole time?” Steven asked.
“Yes, but you could not see it before because it was invisible, but now you can see it because you now have my saliva in your eyes, kiddo.”
“You told us you got your magical saliva powers two years ago. If you didn't have the magical saliva, how you and the others were able to find this spaceship before?”
“Because Garnet has a third eye that sees magical stuff and shit, remember that Steven?” Amethyst replied. “She used her third eye to hide and detect her invisible stuff and sometimes she and Garnet came to this place to kiss each other and have hot Gem sex, the crazy hos…They went here and had lots of sex, but they never invited me to go with them, the crazy hoes…But they are still my friends too…”
“Did…Did my mom went to this place too?” Steven asked.
“Yes, she also went to this place, and she also had a lot of sex with Garnet and Pearl. Lots of sex. Lots of it. Sometimes she even asked Garnet and Pearl to fuse in front of her and then she asked them to have hot gem sex with her, and sometimes she fused with Garnet or with Pearl to have hot fusion gem sex, the crazy ho. But why do you ask me this? Is because you want to know about the hot gem sex your momma used to have here with Garnet and Pearl and with Garnet and Pearl in their fused form? Is because of that? Because if it is because of that, I would say you are one sick fuck mothafucka Steven, asking me about the hot gem sex his mother used to have in the Grand Canyon…”
“I just wanted to know.” Steven replied in a shy voice.
“Well, Steven, you are one sick fuck mothafucka for wanting to know about the hot gem sex your momma used to have here, but I still love you despite that. I guess that deep inside you have the personality of a crazy ho…”
“Ok, now that things have been cleared up, let's go inside the spaceship where my crazy hos friends used to have hot gem sex to go to Eltar to find Zordon!” Amethyst said.
“Ok” the others replied. “Let's GO! “Let's get out of here!”
Amethyst then started pressing some buttons in the control panel of the spaceship, but nothing happened.
“What the fuck?” Amethyst said, and then she pressed more buttons but nothing happened.
“Amethyst… Is there anything wrong?” Steven asked.
“YES.” Amethyst replied with anger. “Now I remember that Pearl and Garnet changed the access code of this fucking spaceship shortly after Rose kicked the bucket…I mean, after she gave up her physical form to bring Steven into the world (or some shit like that) because they didn't want me to see the videos they recorded here of them having hot gem sex inside the spaceship, the crazy hos…”
“Great…So we came here for nothing!” Connie screamed with frustration. “All is fucking lost and the fucking Clarence won! That motherfucker!”
“So now what are we going to do, Amethyst?” Steven asked.
Amethyst stayed silent for a couple of moments, lost in her thoughts. Then she started sucking her thumbs while making weird, slightly suggestive sounds that made the others feel uncomfortable, as if they were witnessing some kind of abominable stuff they were not supposed to look at. So they decided to go to their respective happy places inside their mind in order to not think about Amethyst sucking her thumbs in a suggestive manner, and this is what they saw:Steven:
Steven imagined himself dressed as a Disney princess and then being married to a muscular prince that looked like Connie and who was shirtless all the time. Steven and the shirtless prince that looked like Connie went to the beach, bought some ice cream, then they went to the cinema to see “The Fault in Our Stars” and “Divergent”. Back at their home (Which was a pink castle in the middle of a mint-colored meadow filled with wild flowers and butterflies with sparkly wings. Some pink unicorns with golden horns witnessed how Steven and the shirtless prince started making out in front of the castle, until they were naked and started to have sex in front of the unicorns and the other animals that lived in the meadow that looked like they were from a Disney movie from the 40s.
“Oh, Prince Connie, fuck me harder! I want you to penetrate me!” Princess Steven Universe said while Prince Connie was fucking him in the ass, and gave him a good slap that made Steven feel horny.
(Steven is kinda bi, lol)Connie:
Connie imagined herself as a the ruler of a post-apocalyptic wasteland who was wearing a very cool dominatrix outfit and in her dream she also had half of her head shaved and who had at least 50 sex slaves (Steven was one of her sex slaves too, and she had him with a belt as if he was her dog) and she laughed as she sexually humiliated them, putting black leather didoes inside their anuses, bitchslapping them, and force them to masturbate in front of her, while she watched with an evil grin on her face, while Steven was at her side crying and Connie forced Steven to do a sexy dance for her while he removed his clothes. Steven cried while he was removing his clothes and Connie said:
“Cry all what you want, fucking son of bitch! I like you more when you cry and beg for mercy, fucking manlet!”
“But Connie that is so mean!” Steven cried pathetically.
“Shut the fuck up while I lick your tears and I masturbate you against your will! Your precious manlet tears of pain and humiliation! Oh yeah, how much I love the tears of pain and humiliation!”
Then Connie transformed into a vampire and started sucking the blood of her sex slaves, including Steven.Mayor Bill Dewey:
This is what Mayor Dewey dreamt while he was trying to ignore Amethyst sucking her thumb in a suggestive manner:
He was a sheikh with 60 wives and all of them looked like Pearl except with big boobs and none of them looked at all like his actual wife.
“Oh, Mayor Dewey…” One of the Pearls said in a very seductive manner, as she caressed the chest of the mayor. “Do you want me to talk again about how big is your cock and how much I love sucking it before giving you another fellatio?”
“Yes. Yes, please. I'd like that.”
Then Pearl started talking about how big Mayor Dewey's cock was and how much she liked to suck it, and then she sucked it.
And that's it, nothing more happened during his male power fantasy dream cos Mayor Dewey wasn't very imaginative, and he was more into vanilla sex.Back in the real world
Amethyst had stop licking her fingers in a suggestive manner and had an idea, but the others were too distracted with their own perverted fantasies, so Amethyst had to slap them in the face:
“Stop dreaming, you stupid motherfuckers! I have an idea now; I know what we should do!”
“What we should do?” Steven asked, as his irises turned into stars. He looked like an idiot.
“Okay, people, listen, this is what we are going to do: We are going to remove our shirts and we are going start making out with each other and then we are going to have some hot sex right here to compensate all those times Garnet, Pearl and Rose didn't let me be part of her hot gem sex parties!”
“What? No, Amethyst, we are not going to do that!”
“Ok, ok, you can keep your T-shirt while we are making out and having sex…”
“No! Nobody is going to make out or have sex right now, Amethyst! We have to save Beach City!”
“Fine!” Amethyst replied angrily. “Let's leave the hot gem sex for later! But then don't complain when this crazy adventure turns boring, Steven! DON'T FUCKING COMPLAIN, STEVEN! JUST FUCKING DON'T!
“Okay, Okay I won't complain when the adventure turns boring! But what we are going to do to activate this spaceship to go to Eltar?”
“And why the fuck do you want to go to Eltar, Steven? That planet is so fucking boring, and it's all a fucking desert, kinda like Mars, but less cool…”
“You told us that we will find Zordon in Eltar and that he will help us to save Beach City from Clarence!”
“But Zordon is dead, Steven…”
“BUT YOU TOLD US THAT HIS SPIRIT WAS STILL ALIVE IN ELTAR, AMETHYST! YOU FUCKING TOLD US!”
“Oh yeah, that shit…Sorry, sometimes I tend to forgot stuff…You know, all the beers and drugs I take to cope with my depression for not being invited to the hot sex gem parties made by Garnet, Pearl and Rose…Oh, those crazy, crazy hos get on my nerves so many times…”
“Is this fucking conversation going somewhere?” Connie asked. “Cos I'm kinda tired, so I'm going to take a sit right there while you keep arguing like a pair of fucking idiots…”
And then Connie sit down in some kind of futuristic couch that look like it was made with some kind of living tissue, but Connie didn't mind that, she just sit down the couch and accidentally activated some kind of secret mechanism that somehow made the spaceship to blast off and BOOOOOOM! Suddenly Steven, Connie and the other motherfuckers were launch into space inside the spaceship.
“CONNIE! What the fuck did you did?!”
“'I don't know, Steven! I just don't fucking know”
“Oh shit!” Mayor Dewey exclaimed before threw up. “Fucking hell, this is the worst fucking day ever. Just the worst.”
“Yay!” Amethyst exclaimed, laughing maniacally. “We are going to Eltar and we are going to meet motherfucking Zordon! Yay!”
“No offense, Amethyst but now I kinda see why my mom, Garnet and Pearl didn't want to invite you to their sex parties!!”
“They didn't, cos they were crazy hos, that's all the explanation I need, Steven!”Meanwhile, back on planet earth…
This was happening on Beach City:
Clarence, Sumo and Jeff had taken control over Beach City and the few survivors left became their slaves. Clarence forced them to wear ridiculous and humiliating outfits nobody would wear under any normal circumstance. Some of them were even forced to eat some shit like the tortured kids from Salo or the 120 days of Sodom.
The only one who was spared to eat shit was Sadie, which was forced to wear a sexy odalisque outfit that left nothing to the imagination. She didn't want to wear that shit, but Clarence menaced her with killing Lance and her mother. However, she still refused to accept the disgusting sex offerings Clarence made to her.
“Come on, babe…” Clarence said one morning. “Once you get to know me you are going to realize the kind of dreamboat I am. I'm like Christian Grey: Powerful, sexy, I know what I want, and I also get sexual pleasure by pulling tampons out of women's asses. I also enjoy pulling tampons out of men's asses too, but that's a completely different matter…Come on, babe, let me see your boobs…”
“Don't touch me!” Sadie exclaimed defensively. “Are you unable to see I'm just not attracted to you?”
“Darling, soon you are going to realize any kind of resistance is futile…No woman (or man) of this world is able to resist my incredibly sex-appeal and gorgeous charisma…”
“Ugh!” Sadie exclaimed, with visibly disgust, turning her back on Clarence.
“I see…You are playing hard to get… Come on, darling…Just accept you have the hots for me and I will bang you like no other man has banged you before and everyone’s happy, ok?”
Sadie didn't answer anything, but she seemed visibly annoyed and disgusted by Clarence's advances on her.
Clarence then pulled out a ukulele he had stolen from Steven's house and started playing it:
“Listen this, Sadie! I made a song for you! This song is going to make you wet yourself in pleasure! I call this song "The song that made Sadie wet herself!” Here we go!
♪ I don't care ♫
♪ I don't care ♫
♪ I don't care ♫
♪ I don't care ♫
As a person
About you soul
About your mind…
♪ I just ♫
♪ I just ♫
Want to fuck
♪ I just ♫
♪ I just ♫
Want to fuck
Want to fuck
♪ I just ♫
♪ I just ♫
Want to fuck…
(In the ass, yeah.)
“And the song is done, what do you think babe? Have you wet yourself in pleasure already?”
“You disgust me!” Sadie replied, angrily. “You are insane if you think I will have some kind of intercourse with you, because that is not going to happen!”
“Oh yeah, bitch? Well, if that how things are going to be, you better say goodbye to your dipshit cuck boyfriend and your shitty mom and grandpa, cos I'm going to execute then tomorrow!”
“No, please, don't do that!” Sadie begged, and then Clarence said:
“If you don't want to see your dipshit boyfriend and your dipshit family beheaded by tomorrow (And you know what I will do their skulls) then you are going to make me your new boyfriend, and then you are going to marry me!”
“But marriage is a very serious decision! You need to give me some time to think about that! That is what a good boyfriend would do!”
“Okay, I will give you some time…You have 72 hours to marry me. If by that time you haven't made your choice yet, your dipshit boyfriend and your dipshit family are dead meat. DEAD FUCKING MEAT. You hear me?”
“Good…See you in 72 hours, then!” Clarence said before leaving. “If you're looking for me, I'll be in Steven's house, painting some obscene graffitis over the walls and forcing some dipshits to eat their own excrement and drink their own urine…I do that kind stuff only because I can, but keep in mind they will suffer more because of you, dear Sadie. If you only let me to explore your curves, their suffering will be shorter and far more less painful…Keep that in mind while you take your decision…”
Than Clarence left and Sadie started crying.
“What I will do now?” she asked herself and started praying to the Lord for a miracle to happen.
While this was happening, the spaceship where Ateven, Connie, Amethyst, Mayor Dewey and the Lion were travelling finally arrived To Eltar, but the travelers were left unconscious because the intergalactic journey was too much for them and they needed to rest.
Some shadows walked towards the spaceship…And one little shadow entered inside the spaceship before Steven and the others wake up.
To be continued…