Peppa Le Pew
Peppa Le Pew wandered across the universe, still remembering the time when she was nothing more than ordinary pig, spending time playing with her small brother George and her dipshit friends. Those were happier times.
But everything changed the day some fucking alien bastard decided to invade the planet where people lived, and the alien brought her army of assassins and death machines which devastated the planet and murdered everyone, including George and the dipshit friends of Peppa and Peppa said: “NOOOOOOOOOOOO! FUCK THIS SHIT GODAMMIT!”
And Peppa was ready to suicide because everyone else was dead, but then another UFO landed in the devastated planet where Peppa used to live and some giant old skunk came out from inside the ufo and said:
“Peppa you must not suicide, please don't kill yourself!”
“Huh?” Peppa said. “Who the fuck are you and why should I care about what you think, asshole? Don't you see that my planet has been conquered and my friends and family are all dead? I have no reason to live, motherfucker!”
“Peppa, you need to understand! My planet was destroyed too. I came from a planet where all the skunks from the universe came from, but my race was hunt to extinction by evil aliens too, and I am the only survivor! And my planet was destroyed by the same bastard alien that conquered your planet! We need to join forces to take revenge and save the rest of the Universe!”
“I want to take revenge, but I don't have any power, how I am supposed to fight?” Peppa Pig asked.
“I will train you, I promise!” said the skunk. And then the old skunk revealed his name to Peppa:
“My name is Pepe le Pew”
“Hello” said Peppa. “My name is Peppa. I have a brother called George, but now he is dead, like my mom and dad…”
Peppa was the only survivor of the destruction of her homeplanet, but she was saved from committing suicide by Pepe le Pew, who was also the only survivor of his homeplanet. The two become friends because they both had survivor guilt and they could relate very well, so they were to a peaceful jungle planet where they could train to become strong and take revenge against the evil bastard alien that killed their people.
“Peppa you need to understand every living being has a secret energy that could use as a weapon with enough concentration. That energy is called Cosmos and we all born with that thing attached to our souls. Peppa once you lñearn how to dominate your cosmo energy you will be able to become super saiyan and you will strong enough to fight against the bastard aliens.”
“Okay.” Peppa Pig said.
During her harsh training, Pepe told Peppa the sad story of his life about how he used to live happily in a skunk planet but the bastard aliens started their invasion and fucked everything up, only I survived but I was rescued by a race of animal warriors called the Looney Tunes, they are enemies of the alien bastards and they teach me how to use cosmo-energy and became a super saiyan to fight the evil bastard aliens.
The Looney Tunes live now in a planet called Earth, and they offered me the chance to live with them in that planet but my heart was filled with such an intense desire for revenge that I could not accept their offering and dedicate my life to fight against evil aliens and now I help the people from other planets to survive and fight back against the evil alien bastards.”
“Fuck, that's some hard shit.” Peppa said, and then she continued training to become stronger, and after being involved in at least 300 battles and saving a lot of people along with his master and friend Pepe, Peppa learned how to become a Super Saiyan.
“Now you are ready for the final battle against those evil alien bastards.” Pepe said.
“Yeah, fuck them.” Peppa said, ready to fight.
Before the final battle, Peppa and Pepe visited planet earth to meet the Looney Tunes.
“Maybe some of them will help us to destroy all those fucking evil alien bastards, Peppa.” Pepe said.
“And if they don't, fuck them!” Peppa said in a very badass manner, and Pepe feel proud of her. Pepe loved Peppa (I mean he loved her like a daughter, not in the other way, otherwise he will be a fucking pedo and pedos cannot be heroes because they are bad examples for the youth) and hoped she did not die in the final battle against the evil bastard aliens.
Peppa was a very strong super saiyan pig, but she was still a child, so Pepe allowed her to have some days of fun before the final battle, and during that time Pepe started to reunite a team of powerful super saiyan Looney Tunes to protect the Universe.
The first one to join the team was Bugs Bunny, who wanted to take revenge of the evil bastard alien for destroying a planet with lots of carrots and also for killing Lola Bunny who was zapped to death by Marvin the Martian, one of the evil bastard aliens.
“I will kill Marvin for killing Lola, the love of my life.” Bugs said. “I will kill his dog too.”
Tweety, Sylvester, Taz and Porky joined the team of Pepe and Peppa; Granny joined too: She was not super saiyan like the other Looney Tunes but she used to be part of the army and also was a hacker, so she cracked the code of the computer of one of the giant robots used by the evil bastard aliens and after killing the evil alien with the help of Tweety and Sylvester, she learned how to sue the gaint robot and decided to join the fight in the name of freedom.
She was a very hardcore badass old lady. Granny is Red Sox!
After a short vacation on planet earth, the super saiyan Looney Tunes and Peppa were ready for their final battle against the evil bastard aliens.
But there was a problem: Daffy Duck, despite being the most powerful of the super saiyan Looney Tunes did not want to go on battle because he was afraid of dying. Also because he had take care of his son and daughter.
“Sorry guys, I cannot go with you…” he said. “I am father now and if I die my children will be orphan. I cannot go fighting against evil aliens in the universe and I need to live as a responsible adult now.”
“You are fucking coward!” Bugs said and then he gave the middle finger to him.
“No, is ok.” Pepe said “I will do the same if I had kids. I hope you don't die, Daffy.”
And during the night before the battle, Pepe went to see his ex-girlfriend, a cat called Penelope.
"Hey babe, what’s up?" Pepe said and then Penelope invited Pepe inside their house and that night they went drunk and had sex but Peppa did not know about this until much later.
Also Penelope was knocked up by Pepe, but Pepe did not know he knocked up Penelope, he thought they only had sex and he went to space to fight along Peppa and his super saiyan Looney Tunes friends.
At the next day after Pepe knocked up Penelope he and Peppa went to space along with some super saiyan Looney Tunes, ready to exterminate the evil bastard aliens for once and for all.
They went to space ready to fight and Granny hacked again the computer of the giant robot she stole from the evil bastard aliens to find their evil homeplanet, which in a very distant galaxy.
Marvin the Martin and his dog were there, they travelled all the way from Mars after betraying and killing their people, including their own queen who died cursing Marvin the Martin.
“Curse you…Motherfucker.” The queen of Mars said before dying and on earth Daffy could feel her death, and then he started feeling guilty for not being part of the battle so he let his kids with relative and went to Mars to save the queen of Mars everyone was dead so he screamed: “NOOOOO, FUCKING MARVIN THE MARTIAN, CURSE YOU HEARTLESS MONSTER WITH THE SOUL OF A SNAKE!”
Then daffy found the queen of Mars fatally wounded and agonizing in her throne she said: “Of Daffy you finally are here” and then Daffy said “Please queen of Mars, you have lost a lot of blood, so don't movie, I will get you a doctor…”
“All the doctors in Mars are dead now, Daffy…” The Queen of Mars said and then she also said: “Daffy, I know you are married duck, but I still want to say this before I die: I always loved you, and I wish I had told you this before…Daffy, I love you…goodbye…”
And after those words were said the queen of Mars died and Daffy screamed: “NO! FUCK YOU MARVIN THE MARTIAN! I WILL KILL YOU HEARTLESS MOTHERFUCKER WITH THE SOUL OF A SNAKE!”
Daffy was so angry he went super saiyan, but he had to calm down to save energies for the fight. But first he buried the queen of Mars in the Mars mausoleum, and he also buried other dead martians.
“I will avenge you and your people” said Daffy. And then Daffy returned to earth sand said goodbye to his wife Melissa and his two kids. He said:
“I love you guys, I really wanted to live as a peaceful family guy, but I can't run away from the call of my fate. I am warrior, and probably I will have to die as a warrior. My friends and the universe, and because of my cowardice all the people in Mars is dead now. I won't let that happen again, so I will join Bugs and the other Super Saiyan Looney Tunes against the evil bastard aliens. Goodbye my beloved wife and my beloved children. I promise I will come back to you once the battle is over, even if it is only in spirit…”
Daffy's wife said: “Go then. If you must, go then. But please don't die. Because your life does not only belong to you. Even if you are a warrior, your place is here with me, with your family and kids. Daffy, I love you with all my heart and soul. But if you die and don't return to us, I will never forgive you. Go then, GO!”
Daffy kissed her and Melissa and the kids started crying. Daffy then went super saiyan and left the earth to fight against the evil alien bastards in order to avenge the death of the queen of Mars and the other dead Martians.
Meanwhile, Peppa, Pepe le Pew and the other super saiyan Looney Tunes were fighting against the evil bastard aliens and there was a war in the middle of a distant galaxy. Some warriors from other planets tried to join the battle bringing their giant robots, spaceships and other powerful destructive weapons, but many of those brave aliens were obliterated from existence by the evil bastard aliens which also had very powerful spaceships, giant robots, and also a lot of monsters that looked like Cthulhu and Bokrug and were big enough to eat entire worlds.
“Go away!” Bugs told those brave warriors. “We appreciate your help and all that shit, but those evil bastard aliens will kill you all!”
“We don't care if they kill us! Those evil bastard aliens destroyed our planets and we want REVENGE! If we die, we will die fighting to avenge what we lost in this cruel war!”
Peppa then said to Bugs and Pepe le Pew: “Please, let these aliens to fight for their honor. I am fighting to avenge my planet too, and even if those aliens are not super saiyan like us, that does not mean they don't have a fierce spirit to fight against darkness and injustice! Let them fight, please!”
Bugs did not know what to answer to this, but then Pepe said: “Ok then, let them fight for what they believe!”
Then the other aliens said: “Fuck yeah!” and the battle continued. Many of those aliens died but they all fought fiercely and killed many evil bastard aliens.
“Those fuckers are tough” recognized the treacherous Marvin the Martian who then sent his dog to exterminate the enemies of the evil bastard alien empire.
His dog was genetically modified to fuse with the Bokrug monster and he became a super giant Bokurg monster which was strong enough like a super saiyan but it was evil and its powers was almost completely unstoppable, killing many aliens and destroying many planets.
“Fucker, I will kill your dog for killing Lola, the love of my life!” Bugs said and he fought against the dog of Marvin the Martian, but it was too powerful for him. Pepe, Pepa and the others tried to help but the dog was too strong for them.
All hope seemed lost and Marvin the Martian laughed saying. “I won!” But then Daffy Duck arrived and cut the head of the dog, and said: “Don't worry fellas! I am now here!”
“Daffy! You fucking unexpected bastard!” Bugs said. “I thought you were going to continue living as a coward conformist loser on earth, but finally you are here!”
“Yes, I am here, and I will never run away from who I am!”
Daffy said, and went Super mega-saiyan level 3 and he became so powerful that was able to obliterate the monstrous dog of Marvin the Martian with a single shot.
Marvin the Martian was horrified:
“No!” he said. “No, what you did to my dog you fucking son of bitch! I hate you for killing my dog!”
“Now you feel the same despair of all those innocent Martians you killed, smug fucker. Taste that despair, taste that fear deep in your rotten soul of snake, disgusting motherfucker. Taste it, because it is just a mere prelude of what expects you in hell, you heartless bastard!”
Marvin the Martian laughed and said:
“You really think I am going to die so easily?”
Marvin the Martian then said:
“Since I sold my soul to the supreme queen of the evil bastard aliens, I become much more powerful than you could ever be, super saiyan dipshit. Now I am almost like a god from beyond the stars, so powerful I could change the laws of nature with my strength!”
“More action and less talking asshole!” Bugs said. “You say a lot of bla bla bla, but in reality, you don't do any single SHIT! Come on, let's fight!”
“Very well!” Marvin the Martian said defiantly, as he started to mutate into a monstrous abomination similar to the cosmic horrors that lurk in the darkest corners of our Universe; that unholy beast soon started attacking the super saiyan Looney Tunes and almost killed them with a mere display of its evil super power: It was so strong that even the evil bastard aliens were scared by this beast, and some of them went mad or died of terror by the mere sight of such hideous creature, but Marvin did not care about that because he was drunk with power.
“CONTEMPLATE THE FACE OF YOUR NEW GOD, UNIVERSE! CONTEMPLATE IT AND WEEP AS YOU KNEEL BEFORE ME!”
Then Marvin started to make some planets explode just to brag about his super evil powers, killing millions of life forms and then started to drain energy from the stars to become even more powerful.
“We need to stop this fucker before he became more powerful!” Daffy said. “If we not destroy him now, he will become so powerful the whole Universe will be destroyed!”
“But how we kill this evil cunt if he is basically now like a dark god from the stars?” Tweety asked. “How does somebody kill an evil god?”
“All I know is that if this motherfucker does not die, the entire universe is fucked!” Bugs said. “And now the bastard is getting stronger! I will not allow this!”
“There is a way in which we could fight him!” Pepe le Pew said. “I am not entirely sure this could work, but it is our only hope! We need to combine our energies into one single attack, it's our only chance!”
“Then let's do this shit!”
“We could die!” Pepe said.
“Better to die free than live subjugated by this false god, Marvin the Martian!” Peppa said, and the others agreed.
The super saiyan Looney Tunes combined their energies, becoming a humongous giant made of light which was powerful enough to give Marvin the Martian the good beating he was deserving a long time ago, but then that evil bastard started draining the energy of one star to become more powerful; however, the combined super saiyan Looney Tunes did the same thing and started draining the energy of one star to become more powerful and soon the collide effect of the antagonistic energies became so strong it was threat for the whole Universe.
“Fuck!” Bugs said. “If we continue fighting this way, we will end destroying the whole Universe, and I only want to destroy Marvin the Martian!”
“We need more energy!” Peppa said. “But where the fuck we could get it?”
Peppa and the super saiyan Looney Tunes were having a death battle against Marvin the Martian, who become into a cosmic abomination thanks to the unholy power he received by the queen of the evil bastard aliens, and the shock of their ultimate powers was strong and intense that the Universe was on risk to be destroyed.
From another planet, the queen of the evil bastard aliens said:
“Marvin! Why the fuck you haven't exterminated those miserable super saiyan Looney Tunes yet? WHY?”
“Sorry my queen, I tried my best but those dipshits refuse to die! I don't know what to do to exterminate them!”
“I will tell you what you have to do to exterminate those fuckers, you useless dimwit!” the despicable queen of the evil bastard aliens said. “You need to let me to do the dirty work!”
And after those words were said, the queen of the evil bastard aliens summoned an astral projection that allowed her to possess the mind of Marvin the Martian, infusing him with even more malevolent power than before.
“What the fuck?” Peppa asked, and then Marvin transformed into the most disgusting and disturbing-looking creature they have ever seen. Fuck, it was so ducking disturbing that its mere presence would have made other monsters and abominations from the darkest corners of the cosmos to piss their underpants in fear, because, damn, that was one fucking ugly beast.
“SHIT!” daffy Duck said. “Guys, I think I am going to throw up.”
“No time for that.” Pepe said. “We need to kill this motherfucker, and then we will throw up…”
Unfortunately, before they could make their move, the unholy fusion of Marvin and the queen of the evil bastard aliens attacked them with its dark energies which were strong enough to paralyze them and make them to scream.
“SCREAM MORE, YOU PUNY MEDDLEFUCKERS!” said the Marvin/ queen abomination. “YOUR PAIN IS MY GREATEST PLEASURE AND I WILL MAKE THE ENTIRE UNVIERSE TO HEAR IT!”
Since there was no sound in space, the Marvin/ queen abomination used its power to create a fake atmosphere for the Milky Way, which allowed the people from millions of planets to hear the screams of pain of Peppa and the brave super saiyan Looney Tunes.
All hope seemed lost for the Universe, but the battle was not over yet.
“YOU FUCKER, WILL NEVER BREAK OUR SPIRIT!” Peppa and the super saiyan Looney Tunes said at unison, and reuniting all the strength of their body, minds and souls, they were able to deviate and use the dark energies of their enemy as weapon against it, causing a cataclysmic explosion which ended exposing the core of the monster.
The Marvin/ queen abomination started howling in pain, and the howls of that beast terrified the entire Universe and even made some planets explode, but Peppa and the super saiyan Looney Tunes saw their chance to attack and took it, making their ultimate suicide attack towards the core of the monster: Faster than speed and sound, Pepe teleported (He learned the teleportation technique two years ago during the war against the evil bastard aliens) the entire team inside the exposed innards of the monsters, and once they were there, they decide to use their ultimate technique, a super mega self-destruction explosion.
However, in the last moment, Pepe decided to save Peppa because she was too young and he wanted her to live, so he teleported her back to earth before the explosion.
“Pepe, WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE?” Peppa asked as she saw the explosion from earth, it was such an intense explosion that obliterated several planets and maybe an entire galaxy, but Marvin and the queen of the evil bastard aliens were completely destroyed in the process.
The Universe was saved, but at a big cost, the life of the super saiyan Looney Tunes.
“FUCK! I am alone again!” Peppa said, with despair. “How the fuck I am supposed to go on if everyone I care about ends dying? FUCK!”
“Peppa, don't be sad.” A voice said, and Peppa recognized the voice.
“PEPE! YOU ARE ALIVVE!”
“No, Peppa. Actually I died in that explosion. Sorry, but now I am ghost.”
That was the moment when Peppa noticed that Pepe had a halo over his head, and also had some white wings on his back, and then Peppa realized Pepe become and angel after his death.
“No, Pepe…What the fuck? Why did you have to die? How I am supposed to go on without you?”
“Peppa, you are a brave and strong warrior. You managed to overcome the destruction of your planet and you were able to become a stronger warrior than me. With our death, you are the only super saiyan left in this Universe, and maybe your strength will be needed in the future. I know the solitude of the survivor after the war is such a harsh burden to carry, but you need to go on. For us. For this Universe, the Universe we died, protecting and loving…”
“Peppa, our souls rest in peace now. Bugs was finally reunited with Lola in the afterlife, and the souls of the queen of Mars and all the innocent martians Marvin killed now have achieved the Nirvana…I will reunite with the souls of my ancestors, and the souls of my friends and family…”
“Good for you…” Peppa replied bitterly. “But I am alone once again. I will have to live in complete solitude now that you died…”
“Dear Peppa…I wish I would have told you this while I was still alive…But I love you like daughter. I was afraid of telling you that because I believed you would have think I was a pedo or something like that. But I loved you as the daughter I never had. So in my death, I declare that you are now my daughter in my spirit, carrying my surname for the future generations…From now on, you are not only Peppa Pig…You are Peppa le Pew!”
“Peppa, I miss you! I miss you so much!” cried Peppa.
“Peppa, believe it or not, my spirit will be always with you. My spirit will guide you through the darkest moments of your life and bring you hope every time you need it. Be strong, Peppa. I believe in you…”
“Also please tell my kids and my wife I love them…” Said the spirit of Daffy the Duck from the afterlife. I feel bad for not being able to fulfill my promise to return to them…“
“Ok.” Peppa said.Epilogue
Now that the battle was over and the Universe was saved, Peppa had the harsh task and painful to inform Daffy's wife his husband was dead. It was not an easy thing to do, and Peppa could barely contain the tears when she had to inform this tragic truth to widow.
“No! No! Daffy cannot be dead!” Daffy's wife exclaimed as she fell on her knees, weeping. “Now my kids will have to grow up without a father! Oh, cruel fate! Why did you have to take the love of my life away from me? Oh Daffy, you liar! You promised you will come back to me, to your family…And yet you died…Liar! LIAR!”
Peppa hugged the widow and try to console her, but she and her kids were absolutely heartbroken, and did not want to listen her, but then Daffy's spirit possessed Peppa and in that way, he was able to talk with his family by a last time, reminding them that even when they could not see or hear him, he was going to be always with them, watching over them in one way or another.
“I love you, my family. And I always will…” the spirit of Daffy said, speaking through Peppa. “My love and care always will be with you…”
Moments later, the spirits of Bugs, Pepe, Granny and Taz gave some information to Peppa about the money they had hidden in their houses for achieving their personal goals and dreams.
“But now that we are dead, you should give the money to Daffy's family. We won't need it anymore anyway…”
“Hey Peppa…” Pepe said to Peppa. “Save some of that movie for Penelope. When I died, my soul discovered in heaven that I impregnated her during our last night together, so I would like to bring her some financial support. Can you do that for me?”
“Okay fella…” Peppa said, and she gave all the money to Daffy's family and Penelope.
Peppa was so upset about the death of almost all her friend she went to space in an attempt to clarify her mind and try to find some peace for her soul, but most of the time she got involved in some fight, always fighting against space villains all of whom were defeated and destroy by the super saiyan pig.
Peppa Le Pew wandered the space for a long time, remembering all what happened during those last years along with Pepe until the tragic final battle. And she felt very sad remembering her family, her homeplanet and all his fallen friends which were almost like a family to her.
Some months later, Peppa returned to earth to help Penelope to raise the child of his dead friend Pepe. She was still upset about losing all her friends during the last battle against the evil bastard aliens, but she still did her best to help the single mother cat. Back on earth, Peppa discovered Penelope had two babies, and she recognized the saiyan power in them.
“Maybe there is still hope to rise a new generation of super saiyans…” Peppa thought. “I will allow them to have a normal life for a while, but if evil appears once again in the Universe, I will train them to become powerful warriors, like you trained me, Pepe…”
With that promise on her mind, Peppa found the inner strength to go on, and she was treated by Penelope and the twins as she was part of her family.
That was the beginning of a new generation of warriors, who were destined to live with glory and bravery, under the guidance of Peppa, and with the blessing of the spirit of the deceased Looney Tunes.